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Who lets your marriage be close to disintegrate
From;    Author:Stand originally
Marital misfortune even disintegrate, have certain social parent, but psychologist considers to discover: Some psychology element can make the person feels marital misfortune good fortune likewise, bring about marital disintegrate even.
Above all, to not real hope of the spouse.
The generation of marital problem and the perfect hope that hold to conjugal place are concerned, for instance: Many female expectation husbands can conquer everything is difficult, wife of male criterion expectation can be mixed to all people the thing is kind-hearted and good-tempered, but live to be done not have so simple, the person's behavior often can change as particular case.
A man is likely by an ordinary problem pose, a kind-hearted and good-tempered female, be irritated possibly also by the little trouble of a few trifles. At this moment, the perfect hope that people holds to conjugal place, sufferred the spouse is in reality deny flintily, this kind brings about people to be opposite in the negative the view with oneself or spouse negative generation. For instance, they can think: How cannot I change him hard (she) ; He (she) the person that is a such hopeless so. Such view, can make a couple generate anger and acedia sentiment to each other again, make marriage finally bright have red light thereby.
Next, to unreasonable belief of marriage.
Hold the word of the belief that be as follows and expectation to marriage and spouse when people, extremely possible meeting lets marriage produce a problem:
1. Must " He Ming of musical instrument a twenty-five-stringed plucked instrument " : Think to should agree completely between close partner, between two people any abhorrent it is harmful mixing is annihilative surely to marriage;
2. "The heart has Ling Xi " do not nod connect oneself: Think the spouse that love each other should not need direct communication, with respect to the right think of a way that can find each other, this ability is " have mutual affinity " ;
3. Identifying humanness is unalterable, the stand or fall of the relation also is changeless;
4. Think sexual life always must be perfect, should not have a bit drawback.
So, the hope that becomes matrimony and oneself feels with respect to meeting equipment when occurrence contrast disappointment and setback, push matrimony to abyss stage by stage.
The 3rd, not happy to marriage mistake explains.
Not happy couple, often think inactive behavior of the spouse is to stem from them " nature moves hard " what cause, and positive action of the spouse is brief, accidental, be " transitory " , always understand matrimony so, can bring about a couple the crisis in chronically exaggerated marriage, and the happiness in oversight marriage, and more abandon easily or evasive the settlement to the problem, be close to disintegrate till marriage.
Psychologist considers to discover, people cannot get happy marriage, the means that is spouse of themselves look upon and marriage actually causes. Want to make marriage happy, want to begin from the idea of own heart above all, use hard more accord with the action that the relation between husband and wife and spouse need in light of reality, more rational, bouncier also means, with active state of mind and good communication, for the love with matrimony continuous fill.
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